Patrick Stewart is *Awesome*

This video is amazing. For every woman who has been hurt, for every woman who has been afraid, for every woman who wondered why no one rescued her, who thought she couldn't rescue herself; for every woman who bears the scars on her heart and quite possibly her body as well, this is like a healing balm.

I wanted to title this PATRICK STEWART IS A MAN!!!! but I thought that might be taken the wrong way, or the caps lock might have been off putting. What I mean is, he is a man in the best iteration of the word, he is a man as men were ought to be.

We need more men like him. We need everyone like him.

I am so proud he exists.

Life tip # 7 Vitamins

The B vitamins, from B12 to folic acid are very good for you. 

You should take them every day.

But remember to eat if you're taking a multivitamin with the metals in it. 

Otherwise you may find yourself divested of the vitamins 

in a most unpleasant manner. 

Secret of me # 7

I'm not entirely sure that I like to read. It's just a really convenient way to satisfy my eternal curiosity.

I had another one, but I forgot it as soon as it came.Oops. 

Words About Women Matter

Do you know what really gets to me? What pisses me off?

I hear it so often: "They were just words." 

Bull shit.

Words are ideas, ideas are words. Without ideas, without thoughts there would be no words. They're not just words. 

And you don't even have to mean them for them to effect you, effect others. 

Words matter.

My first semester of psychology my professor talked about an experiment, one that's been repeated over and over. Subjects watch a video of a crash; hardly a crash, a fender bender. And then they leave. When they come back they're asked to recall the crash. Oh, but they don't say "please tell me about the crash." They change the words, the bump, the crash, the collision, the accident. And the words they use to ask the question change the memories of the subjects. Some recall a mild incident, others think they saw a body. The suspected speed of the vehicles change as well. 

Just from one little word. 

So why is it, that you think it doesn't matter when a woman is called "little girl." It's just words. 

No it's not.

It's a patronizing piece of shit idea being given a voice. 

If it's not your idea, don't spread it.

Why is it that virtually every romantic story I read has the male lead considering how small, how insubstantial, the size of the heroine is. Insubstantial. That word is used. So is small, tiny, insignificant, barely there, wispy. Women are supposed to be insubstantial. And this is written by women. Do they even realize? These words will sink into your mind, they will damage you, like glass you didn't know you were eating.

A stranger calls you baby. It's not a compliment. Whether he means it or not it's part of a cultural consciousness that takes strength and maturity away from women. 

A woman calls a man a dog. She's not just mad. She's expressing a cultural belief that men are uncontrollable, out of control, irresponsible. That word; stunting a whole sex's ability (right, even) to be brave, selfless, heroic. 

You get in a fight and call her a bitch, then want to say "I didn't mean to say it." You said it, so you believed it. Don't apologize for words when you keep the belief in a dark place in your heart, ready for later. Apologize for the belief when you're ready to stop believing the words you said. 

Don't tell me they're just words.

Words matter.

Secret of me # 6

My mother

says

I'm like Merida, from Brave.

I take that as a point of pride.

Most people would also do well to know this about me

when approaching me.

Off the Subject

I just want to say that I like Benedict Cumberbatch and whoever else, Chris Pine, or Taylor Lautner, or Ryan Gosling as much as anyone else.

They're all talented good looking guys, most of them are even very talented at acting, some more than others, but that's beside the point.

I...assume I would not be upset to meet any of them. No more than I would any other talented good looking guy, would make it cool that I already knew their name before meeting them and thus wouldn't have to ask it ten times in one night just to remember.

But, and this relates to my previous  post about fangirls, I am incredibly uncomfortable when I read or see women worshiping these men. And lately, I can't look at a new photo posted on fb or read an article on someone's upcoming movie or check out an interview without the comments section being inundated with such things.

If it was girls, well, I understand a certain level of delusional idiocy. I was never one of those girls as a teen, but I was delusional and stupid about other things.

But it's not! It's grown women! Women writing things I am not going to repeat because they're just ... wrong. 

I will never ever worship any man.

As a teacher I have been on the receiving end of just a little of that undue attention that comes from being a public face and it is acutely uncomfortable.

(I know it's culture to think that if someone is willing to be seen they belong to the public, but that's not true. Everyone has a right to privacy, everyone has a right to respect, everyone has the right to be seen *first* as a person, before they're seen as a face, or an object. Frankly, no one should be seen as an object, and objectifying men doesn't make up for the wrong of women being objectified, it just makes the world doubly as messed up as it was before.)

I cringe for these men, and for the discomfort they have to endure from rabid fans, and the damaging risk it poses to their sense of self. It is not encouraging, it is not helpful. At worst, it is dangerous and destructive, at best to be tolerated and ignored.

I cringe for the women voicing these extreme and disconnected views. I can't help but wonder if they suffer from a mental illness. Whose life is so devoid of joy and meaning that they turn to a pretty face on a screen as their source of personal identity/joy/adoration/holiness?

I'm embarrassed for my sex.
I'm embarrassed on behalf of my species.

Please, stop worshiping strangers, stop lusting after men you don't even know. Like them, respect them, and leave it at that. They, you, and the world will be a better place because of it.

Review of Star Trek Into Darkness

I'll get right to the point. 

This movie kicks ass.

(warning: spoilers ahead)

I really enjoyed Star Trek Into Darkness. It has just enough cheese, and some very good acting. Both Pine and Cumberbatch, wow, they killed it. 

I didn't feel the movie was too long. Rather, I felt like it was too short. 

This movie has the thing that makes all great movies and television shows amazing; the ability to ignite people's imaginations. 

I liked the whiz and bang of the movie, though I would have liked to see a little more heart between the secondary characters.

Also, the humor was good, very good, and much needed in the midst of what could have become a very dark film. Because the truth is, Khan was always a bad guy and a good guy. The villain you love, and Cumberbatch did a great job portraying that. The humor did a great job of cutting that angst. 

Otherwise, I was surprised at the amount of emotion Spock showed at Kirks death, particularly the tears, since at this point they've only known each other for a few years. In the previous Khan movie they'd been friends for more than 15 years. So, with that in mind the tears felt premature. Also, did they do his ears differently? 

I would have liked to hear some kind parting words from Pike to Kirk, and I was surprised that Spock didn't impart them.

Aside from that, I have no complaints. 

This movie is definitely one of the few that will make it to my dvd collection. 

Secret of me # 5

I

...

am not

a fangirl.

There are plenty of people in the media who I find talented or fascinating or even attractive

but I will never ever ever follow them, learn everything about them, stalk them, scream at 

a picture or video of them, watch all their movies, or incorporate some asinine name the gist of which being I worship them into any part of my identity. 

Because

I am not a fangirl.

Life Tip # 6 Advanced Level, Advice

Never refuse to give advice when asked 

(even if you don't feel qualified)

But

Give advice sparingly

(and never without asking)

Secret of Me # 4

I don't have a television. 

Really.

I'm not a weirdo. I don't wear long skirts. I don't forgo technology.

But,

I don't "watch TV." I can't even stand to be in the same room as a TV that's on for "background noise." Or, even when it's not, for more than an hour or two.

Because it's not in the background, it's going into your head, influencing your thoughts and ideas. Unless you are constantly and consciously filtering out all the influence the TV is putting in than you're just letting someone effect your life and thoughts willy-nilly. 

What I watch I choose to watch. I watch you tube, channels I've subscribed to, things that seem fun or interesting, usually skipping or muting the ads. I watch the shows on their online channels, muting the ads as often as possible. I watch through netflix. If I don't like what I'm watching, I stop. I don't just change the channel.

I hate TV. I hate the buzzing sound it makes, I hate the words constantly being pushed into my head. I hate the constant unending assumptions that I, the viewer, need something and they want to tell me what.

I don't need anything you amoral leech. Thank you very much. 

So, I don't own a television.

I've found I'm a much much happier person overall without it.

Life Tip # 5 Never trust

Never Trust a skinny chef. 

The Cat

I think the house cat is going to miss me when I move. Generally follows me around the house or yard when I'm home, and looks for snuggles. He loves when I work in the garden because he can flop on the brick patio or in the grass and I will pet his belly. Poor guy is going to become very needy with just one person around.

Secret of me #3

I love getting dirt under my fingernails. 

Secret of me # 2

I am willing to spend upwards of $70 dollars on a good piece of make-up 

but I'm absolutely repulsed by extravagance of bags/shoes/jewelry/whatever

 by Gucci, or Prada, or Louis Vuitton or any other "high end" designer. 

Go figure. I'm only partly practical.

Secret of me # 1

I once 

went through all the mugs in my cupboard 

with a big  plastic cup filled with water and checked to see how much water each mug would hold before selecting the 2 mugs that held the most 

as my favorite coffee mugs.

;-)